This question is much like the previous one in that it gives the other person a chance to talk about personal goals and desires and to look favorably on you for asking it. It also gives you insight into how dedicated she is to her profession and how proficient she may be at it. When you learn what her previous experience has been, you begin to see ways that you might refer other people to her for specialized products or services.
3. Where else do you usually network?
Not only does this question help break the ice during that sometimes awkward period just after you've introduced yourself, but it also gives you a chance to talk about something you both know a little bit about.
Another reason to ask this question is because it gives you the opportunity to make an instant connection. It provides the other person valuable information he may not have known, on a topic relevant to him; chances are good you'll run into him at that next meeting. As we all know, a great step toward creating a solid referral partner is to first make a connection with that person.
4. What are some of your biggest challenges?
This is a great question that can be used toward the end of the conversation. Of the questions mentioned thus far, this one usually elicits the longest response. Why? Because you're asking about her passions and her motivation.
5. How can I help you?
Only once you've asked a new acquaintance some or all of the above questions, the conversation has gone well and you've decided this person is someone you'd like to have in your business network, is this a good question to ask. Being helpful is the best way to start building a solid relationship. For an experienced networker it's a question that comes naturally, because that networker is one who has adopted the mindset of giving value and service to others without any thought of immediate return. It demonstrates that you have the other person's interests foremost in your mind, and it's an excellent way to build the credibility and trust necessary for a valuable networking partnership.
Asking the right questions is about earning trust and gaining rapport with a new contact. It's about your contact feeling comfortable telling you about her business without competing with you for "airtime." But most of all, asking the right questions is about developing a relationship with a future referral partner, so she'll be more than happy to give you any referral that might come her way.
Called the "father of modern networking" by CNN, Dr. Ivan Misner is a New York Times bestselling author and the Founder and Chairman of BNI, the world's largest business networking organization. His newest book, Networking Like a Pro, can be viewed at www.IvanMisner.com. Dr. Misner is also the Sr. Partner for the Referral Institute, an international referral training company.
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